Wednesday, 9 February 2011

in a talkative mood

我發現一個好友在變成了「實際上單身」的狀態後,facebook上的活動變的活躍許多,發言的頻率和分享的資訊比以往多了許多,我覺得我現在似乎也處於這種可以理解的多話狀態。

她被我們朋友圈子稱為「戀愛女王」,自己也笑說「還真是什麼都被我遇過了」這一類的話,對愛情的評論也一針見血的精準,我喜歡跟她分享關於感情的雜念碎思,因為我知道她一定懂。一直以來她的身邊從來不缺某一個特定的人分享心情,不論真實狀態是否為「穩定交往中」或者「單身」。

前陣子她才決心斬斷了一段協議加上默契似有若無的小小戀情,從開始到最後我都在隔岸觀火的絕佳位子,偶爾聽她說起這樣子的安排很好,戀愛經驗值低弱的我當然也只能全力支持,因為很羨慕。

有一個人可以專心聽你說話,知道有一個人願意分享你的生活,那是一件多好的事啊。


但是日子一久了,就算真的不期待更多,也很難不去限制那個專心聽你說話的人不對別人也這麼專心的聽別人說話。

愛情畢竟不是合約買賣,權利義務總是不清不楚難以劃分的。


恢復單身之後最無法適應的大概就是這件事,某些很開心、很消極、很興奮、很苦悶的時候,忽然有些手足無措,因為那個人消失了。

我花了一些時間消化某些情緒,因為這是成熟大人的表現;花了很多時間在論文和工作還有那些具有人生重要意義的事情上,然後也花了一些時間排滿了與朋友們喝酒聚會看戲的行程,反應遲鈍如我,隔了好久好久以後才開始書寫。這是大概可以算是最近更新異常頻繁的Journey to the West的最好註解。

Breakable, by Ingrid Michaelson  Herewith I dedicate this song to my dear friend. We both know that  we're not as brave as we wanted to be. It's totally fine. We need not to compromise, so far.
It'd be my pleasure to your substitute listener, anytime.



Have you ever thought about what protects our hearts?
Just a cage of rib bones and other various parts.
So it's fairly simple to cut right through the mess,
And to stop the muscle that makes us confess.

And we are so fragile,
And our cracking bones make noise,
And we are just,
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls and boys.

You fasten my seatbelt because it is the law.
In your two ton death trap I finally saw.
A piece of love in your face that bathed me in regret.
Then you drove me to places I'll never forget.

And we are so fragile,
And our cracking bones make noise,
And we are just,
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls and boys.

And we are so fragile,
And our cracking bones make noise,
And we are just,
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls-
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls-
Breakable, breakable, breakable girls and boys.
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